Trust

"Therefore the Lord heard this, and was wroth: so a fire was kindled against Jacob, and anger also came up against Israel; Because they believed not in God, and trusted not in his salvation."

After reading these verses in Psalm 78, I began to do some thinking on trust. The verses before are speaking of the children of Israel. God did so much for them, yet they still did not trust. It is so easy for me to look at the those children of Israel and think. "What was wrong with you. God fed you angel food, He provided you water from a rock, etc..." Then I look at my life, God has done so much for me yet I still struggle in this area of trust.

I thought back to my childhood. I was sure my dad was the strongest, my mom was the smartest, etc... Don't get me wrong my dad is super strong and my mom is incredibly bright :) But I remember discovering that dad couldn't do everything (just almost everything) and I remember coming to the age where mom could no longer help me with those math problems. I lost a little bit of trust. I'm not a parent. Yet, I imagine as a parent you would feel sad when you no longer could solve all of your child's problems. Then I thought, imagine how my God feels when I begin to loose trust in Him, how angry and frustrated He must get with me. Sometimes I like to imagine God sitting in heaven with tears in His eyes, looking down upon my life. Watching me struggle to solve all of life's problem on my own. He cries to me, "Brooke don't you know you can trust me, I am all powerful; I am all knowing. You never have to loose trust in me. Brooke, trust me. Give me your problems." Yet, so often I struggle on. While God sits in heaven wondering why after all He has done I have lost trust.

I then thought back to times in my life in which I have gotten in trouble from my parents. They could discipline me, ground me, do anything to me, but the thing that would hurt me the most severely were the words , "Brooke- we cannot trust you." I hated when my mother would say that to me. Far more than anything I wanted my parents to be able to trust me. As a human I long for other to trust me. I believe everyone desires to gain the trust of others, whether it is the trust of your child or of a parent, or friend, etc.... I have a Father in heaven who simply wants me to trust Him as well. I believe He rightfully deserves my trust.

God help me to TRUST!